Demecas
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Why parents DrinkA father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished
to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was
picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up
prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad."
With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with
trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Dad:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing
you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I
wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I have been
finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.
But I knew you would not approve of her because of all
her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and
the fact that she is much older than I am.
But it's not only the passion...Dad...she's pregnant.
Angie said that we will be very happy. She owns a
trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for
the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more
children.
Angie has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana
doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for
ourselves and trading it with the other people that
live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.
In the meantime we will pray that science will find a
cure for AIDS so Angie can get better. She deserves
it.
Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of
myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit
so that you can get to know your grandchildren.
Love, Your Son John
PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at
Tommy's house. I just wanted to remind you that there
are worse things in life than a bad report card (it's
in my center desk drawer). I love you. Call me when
it's safe to come home.
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